“There’s nothing wrong with loving who you are”
She said, “‘Cause he made you perfect, babe”
“So hold your head up girl and you’ll go far,
Listen to me when I say”
I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby I was born this way!”
The song Born This Way created an uproar worldwide as Lady Gaga showed her support for the LGBT Community. So what?? When I look back at the lyrics of the song, all it conveys is “LOVE THY SELF” and “BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE“. We as a nation are fearless when it comes to military affairs or politics and what not, but when it comes to love, WE SIMPLY HIDE & LIE LOW! It is even worse, when it comes to SELF LOVE.
We feel that if we care for ourselves or if we go by our set priorities, the world would hate us and pull ourselves steps away from our inner-sense. But why do we do it?
I had always been like Geet from Jab We Met, but after getting married to a big family, life had been set on a roller coaster ride. The simplicity in life turned into huge amount of complexities making me neglect many of my priorities. All along, my husband stood beside me rock solid. We were like the lead couples from Tumhari Sulu by then.
An year after the marriage I was living a life, yet something was incomplete. And then I had Ayaansh! The most beautiful aspect of my life! A part of us hovering around our feet, giving us the most blissful feelings of life. I was contended outside, but yet I struggled to keep the ambiguity inside. It was at that point last year, when I heard this song and something struck me very deeply & then it finally dawned upon me, ‘I HAD STOPPED LOVING MYSELF!’ The wife and mother in me had taken prominence, and the bubbly-talkative-full-of-life-girl was lost. I had forgotten my passions, my friends, my preferences and my desires.
So, what did I do next? I grabbed a notepad, a pen and did something that made me flip around! Well, these things worked for me and if these work for you, I will be very much elated.
STEP ONE: Write all the things that you never wanted to do or wish didn’t happen with you or all the things that makes you cringe. You can write few names, places or instances, whatever that comes to your mind. Please remember when you do this activity, let there be no one bothering you, put your phones in silent mode. You will be surprised to see a long list. Once complete, read it aloud. Repeat once more if required. NOW, TEAR IT INTO AS MANY AS PIECES YOU WANT. FLUSH IT OR THROW IT. NEVER LOOK BACK!
STEP TWO: Take a pretty book, fancy colored pens. Write about all the things/people/places you love. Jot down all the movies you want to see, the music you want to listen, the food you love to eat, the places you want to go. READ IT ALOUD AGAIN! REPEAT IF NEEDED. You feel alive after doing it.
STEP THREE: I discussed all my desires and ambitions from STEP 2 with my husband, we further made our year goals. We plan our week, our days ahead and ensure our schedules are set. I had asked my husband to do the above steps so that we both can be on the same page and since we had many a things different in our list, we make sure to give each other that ME TIME to fulfil the desires, whatsoever by taking turns in looking after the little one.
STEP FOUR: When things got sorted out between us, the battle was half won. But to conquer the world I had to say NO, to many people around me. It was now very imperative that I stood to my ground and set my preferences. The family and the world were seeing a revolutionary version of me. Many times at this stage, we were mocked, pushed and shoved and the real battle had begun and I am fortunate to have my hubby as the backbone of my life.
STEP FIVE: At this point, my happiness and peace was restored and I ensured that I have my ME TIME every day. My #metime includes reading books, listening to my choice of music, watching TED Videos or commercials, watching new recipes, doing my DIY stuff.
So, it’s very important to do the things we love on a daily basis. The ME TIME can be 5 minutes to an hour or 2(you are lucky, if you get more!). UTILISE IT EFFECTIVELY!
STEP SIX: GO OUT and MEET NEW PEOPLE. Network with like-minded individuals. Go on a shopping-spree. Catch-up with old buddies, share those nostalgic memories. Call your friends often. Be in touch.
STEP SEVEN: EAT, PRAY AND LOVE your body! Have your morning cup of coffee/tea/breakfast in a non-frenzy manner. Relish it, savor your food. You are eating for maintaining a healthy body. A healthy body gives you healthy mind and in turn makes you positive. SO EAT, DON’T SACRIFICE THAT ONE PIECE OF APPLE FOR YOUR LOVED ONES. YOU ARE YOUR FIRST LOVE!
PRAY: Be thankful for all the good things and people in your life. Be humble to all, Thank the Almighty. If things are going wrong, still pray! Pray to HIM to make things right. Ask for help if required. Show your gratitude, reciprocate the love.
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, LOVE YOUR BODY! You may be slim or chubby,doesn’t matter – JUST STAY FIT! Exercise and Meditate. Get the stamina up. Go for a trek, run a marathon and eat a cookie! JUST KEEP LOVING YOURSELF!
Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Whether you’re broke or evergreen
You’re black, white, beige, cholo descent
You’re Lebanese, you’re Orient
Whether life’s disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied, or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
‘Cause baby you were born this way
WISH YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY 2019!
This post is a part of #UnapologeticGirlz Blogathon @mylittlemuffin hosted by, @mommyvoyage and @themomsagas, sponsored by @kaurageousyou
It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers are celebrating Women’s Day with a twist.
I thank another awesome mom Sneha Jubin who blogs at www.itsatwinningstory.wordpress.com for introducing me. Do check her posts.
I would also take the opportunity to introduce Aditi Anand who blogs at http://www.teatimetalkies.com . Do check her blog to take a look at her take on Self Love
Thanks to all three creative organizers of this Blogathon who came up with such innovative prompts.